Valimore leapt higher in the air and began to charge a black ball of both dark and vampiric power. It grew massively with a potential to kill 10,000 humans in one blow. after it's radius reached a massive 5,000 feet, he began to put more vampiric energy into it. It seemed to suck out all light around until all that could be seen was pitch darkness.
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, WHOA!
Sorry, if I'm sounding harsh, but that is just insane! If you even read the rules you should know that something THAT powerful isn't allowed to be charged in such a tiny amount of time, maybe the entire chapter. And 5,000 feet in radius!? I once had Duilin summon a fireball that was 20 feet in radius and that was considered insanly huge. What does this guy summon moons?!
I know, you didn't kill 10,000 humans, with it, but it's implied and that is just TOO powerful, NOBODY can realistically survive that attack. I think you're taking Retan's sayings to literally, because but it's not like humans are worthless insects compared to everyone else. If your character can kill that many people in one post, he could probabbly destroy the entire world in three.
And as for your guy transforming into a Draken, that is also unfair, because you did that in one post while Jayce did it in two. A lot, if not all, of your characters are really cheap.
Don't go Haraldur on us...